Life sucks majorly right now.

Every time I go to seminary, at least three people say somethin that sounds like it's directed to me, and not in a good way. I want out, but I cannot escape. I cannot even tell my parents that I don't believe the same as they do because they've said before that if I turn away from their church, I'll be kicked out and on my own.

I don't know what it's like to be in love, but every time this certain person, he avoids me and he refuses to talk to me and it feels like me heart's being torn apart. Is this love? Or is it just me deluding myself so far that I believe that it is?

That's enough from all your taunting
Seems I can't remove you from my mind
Don't you know that sometimes
I wish they'd kill me from wanting you
I will sit alone in silence
Can't allow the meaning I can find
Will you be defeated when they
Kill me from wanting you